A ‘Thank You’ To Mike Ashley

It seems that we are finally at the end of the dictatorship of Mike Ashley, and his reign over Newcastle United. Noise in the press as of late has been positive around the takeover, with most stories now seem to be looking beyond the PIF/PCP/Reuben’s consortium getting the keys to the Cathedral on the Hill.

So with that said, I would like to write an open ‘thank you’ letter to our departing owner.

Dear Mike,

It seems our time together has come to an end. It has been 13 long years that have beaten us into a pulp, and killed our will and hope. You have hidden away in that time, coming out from the shadows on the rare occasion one of your chosen journalists are free to ‘talk’. However I would like to take this time to thank you:

Thank you for taking a club that looked up towards the heights of football, we didn’t always reach them, but at least we tried, to a club that was always looking down. Down to another relegation, down to the clubs who wanted to progress passing us by, down to the bottom line on the balance sheet. You managed to stagnate us, we managed to stand still, while the rest of the football world moved away from us.

Thank you for teaching us how NOT to act as a human being. How to take figures universally loved by the fans, and discard them like a piece of s*** on your shoe. How without batting an eyelid you sacked our Argentinian Spiderman by a phone call, after he had survived cancer, and scored an important goal to keep us in the Premier League. How a figure who allowed us to hope, was continually lied to, and backed into a corner by your little gremlins you employed, to the point not only did they take money out of your back pocket, felt they could not return to the club they love while your name’s above the door. How to dismiss a clubs record goal scorer, to the point a former owner had to pay for his statue just of the clubs ground!

Thank you for clearly indicating which store not to shop in. Jesus that red and blue crap was everywhere! Using the hallowed ground of St James’ Park as an advertising board, and then saying we couldn’t compete with other clubs financially! No we couldn’t because you took all the advertising space for FREE! Why should anyone pay millions upon millions of pounds to advertise their wares when it would be swallowed by all the Sports Direct hoardings around the ground. Then thinking it was a good idea to rename a ground that has been there since the days of Newcastle West End, after you tat shop.

Thank you for allowing us to be rid of such fantasy as dreams and hope. Who need them anyways, they just get in the way of crushing reality. Thank you for allowing new fans to see the club and their father saying “I’m sorry son I know nothing else”. Thank you for making the love we have for our club become a chore, something we did out of loyalty, and couldn’t drag ourselves away. Thank you for driving a wedge between the fan base, a group of people who once could be classed as a football family were now infighting.

But mostly I would like to thank you for finally selling a club, you have slowly poisoned. Yes there are other clubs that are worse off, but this is our club, this is what we love, this is all we care about. Are we in a good place financially, yes, but thats because you wouldn’t spend anything! The infrastructure has collapsed, the training ground is the same as it was when you bought the club, yet still think it’s ‘fit for purpose’.

There are plenty of things I have missed, this is a letter not a book! You have been a stain on the game of football, and as the current situation has shown to the nation, you are a stain on society. So thank you Mike for making loving our club the hardest thing in the world!

Now you can take your money, and walk of into the sunset, and if you could kindly take your little stooge with you that would be great.

So in short Mike – off you f***

Yours Sincerely


I don’t pretend to write for the entire fanbase, just myself. I hope this letter has covered all of that. Now hopefully is the time for dreams and hope again, and the end to this chancer and his shop!

7 thoughts on “A ‘Thank You’ To Mike Ashley

  1. Wow brilliant Carl! The day we can all go back to St James after MA is no longer there will be heavenly!

    After these 13 years, the end of MA is so close and I could not be happier – Lets just hope the takeover gets finalised without any other hiccups!

    Keep up the good work, really enjoying your recent articles 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Appreciate it mate, tbh thought there would be more reaction to it on Twitter like 😂

      I am working on summit at the minute, just need to work out how to do it

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Aye every article goes on Twitter, share it on my TftG feed and personal!

      Gonna do like a legends profile page, but need to figure out how to publish them to a certain page on my site, and not get lost in the other blog posts


  2. Nice one mate!

    Im on twitter too – @hotnufc – Send me a DM if you get stuck with creating a specific page, I did just the thing a couple of weeks back so can give you a hand if needed


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